Home United KingdomLondon Get Me Out of Here: Fig & Olive

Get Me Out of Here: Fig & Olive

by Krista

151 Upper St
N1 1RA
Tel: 020 7354 2605

Date of Last Visit: Saturday, September 23rd, 2006 (Yes, a belated posting. I wrote it, but didn’t post it. Apologies.)

The Victim: My fellow “Strong”–you may know it as Long—Islander (NY, USA), Stacey

The Damage: Unknown! Stacey paid.

Counterbalance: 5K, or 3.2 miles!

We were supposed to be having Thai foot massages. Yes, I had run a 5K that morning (good for me!), and having done most of my running on stationary treadmills as of late, the five kilometres on pavement had my shins a-screaming. I mentioned this in passing to Stacey later that afternoon, and she promptly took me to her local Thai foot massage parlour. Yes, you read that correctly. Said parlour was also offering 20% off if you had an appointment. So we dropped in, made appointments for 45 minutes later, and went in search of sustenance.

We dropped into Fig and Olive, which looks lovely from the street. The windows are full of all sorts of gorgeous tarts and chocolates. Behind the desserts, you’ll spy trays of fresh string beans, chickpeas, feta…all sorts of beauteous cold salads.

As soon as I sat down, I knew F&O was a mistake. There were plenty of wait staff, but they were wandering aimlessly, making needless trips from the front of the narrow restaurant to the back, front to back, front to back, stopping everywhere but where we were. Foot massage appointment in jeopardy!!! We finally grabbed one meanderers eye, and he took our order: carrot soup for Stacey, cold salad plate for me. As it was a salad BUFFET, I asked if I should help myself. Our meanderer explained he would make the plate up for me. How nice, I thought. How gentlemanly even.

Alas—there is something so very wonderful about the Ponderosa. You can serve yourself; you do not need to watch the staff wander here, wander there, wander everywhere but where they need to be. You do not need to watch the lonely string beans grow colder by the minute so far away from you on the other side of the room. You can just eat.

Eons later, our food arrived. It was okay. But its arrival was timed not-so-nicely with our foot massages. We ate. We paid. We ran. We let strange people touch our feet, and we were safe in the knowledge that we would never go back to Fig & Olive again.

The Verdict: Don’t.

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3 comments

Tom 2009 -

Googled my way to this posting since I had one of my worst restaurant experiences ever at Fig and Olive very recently and just wanted to echo the stay-far-far-away-sentiment. This place really doesn’t deserve to be in business.

Krista 2009 -

Ooh, tell me more! Yeah, I don’t like this place. At all.

Ebi Atawodi 2009 -

Oh Goodness, I suddenly feel silly recommending this to you now :s

I’ve been four times, twice to eat both of which were weekdays, and sometime in the afternoon… completely empty (perhaps thats a sign) so the service was amazing! And the other two occasions, late in the evening quite packed and simply for wine + some tarts. They did tend to walk back and forth! But I’ve learned to ask waiters for their names and yell it out when they can’t seem to do their job.

I’ll be sure to search the blog before making any further recommendations.

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